I personally find it offensive… Well to some, they might not of even known there is a difference. To many, “Nerd” vs.”Geek”, they are one in the same. To those of us who actually wear the tag with honor and dignity, “GEEK” is the title of choice when it comes to “our kind.” So, “What’s a ‘Geek’ and what is a ‘Nerd’?” You ask? I’ll try my best to break it down in a series of scenarios peppered with irrefutable facts that will get you using the adjective in its proper form. I have drawn the proceeding conclusions in my time living amongst a tribe of “Nerds” in my early adult years. I observed their behavior and was able to study their culture well maintaining a safe distance as to not to be assimilated into their society and sleeping down wind, as to not be accidentally eaten. Hopefully, once you’re done reading this you’ll agree that “NERD”, is a “4-Letter Word!”

Let’s start with a Geek and a Nerd in a common social gathering, a party. Now, I know what you’re already thinking, “Well, a Nerd wouldn’t be AT a party!” See, you are already starting to see the difference! So please, read on and for the sake of this blog, pretend we abducted a Nerd for this experiment! :D I digress…A geek can go to a party and hang out with complete strangers and “blend” in. They could find something interesting to talk about with someone interested enough to hear, because like Nerds, Geeks are intelligent, but Geeks are also diverse in culture and interests. A Geek is interested in movies, music, art, sports, video games any one of these in some form or another as well as being well versed in History, Politics, Math (for some, NOT this guy!), etc . A Nerd stands out like a sore thumb! Geeks, not always being the most “snappy” of dressers, admittedly, at least have enough social awareness to match a shirt to a pair of jeans and shoes and create their own “style”, another Geek over Nerd Trait. A Nerd would wear the same outfit he wore to a party, to church the next day, and probably to the beach (again, if he were abducted and left there for the name of science and observation). A Nerd would not know what to talk about with most of the people at a party. Nerds can be very narrow in scope when it comes to social interests. Science and the hardest core of sci-fi (Too Sci-Fantastic for common Geeks to comprehend), mathematics, politics and religion are pretty much all they know and none of these; especially the “Uber-Sci-Fi” is great party conversations. Because of the constant social rejection a nerd would more than likely have developed some sort of social phobia and would likely find the furthest corner of the party and hide. Our abducted Nerd passed out in the walkway once he heard the DJ and laughing…

Nerds fit in and socially get along with other nerds. A Geek is a diverse individual who enjoys many things. A Geek could totally hang out with a Nerd and try to find common ground, where a Nerd would probably look down on the Geek as a lesser semi-intelligent life form…either that or be plagued by aforementioned social phobia and pass out…Yes, you may work at JPL and you figure the calculations necessary to land a rover on a distant planet, and you wear glasses. But then after work you let your hair down, drive to the Viper Room for drinks, and catch a live show with your buds who are as “Geeky” as you are in some aspect or another…guess what that probably makes you! And you know you have a co-worker who goes home and plays with her 5 cats while she knits them sweaters, start to see the difference? Which leads me to my next point…Sex! Yes sex! Geeks are more prone to have sex with more socially attractive people then a Nerd would. Now, Bill Gates and Uber-wealthy Nerds are not affected by this. But your common variety Nerd, can only land your common variety “Nerd-ette.”  We have all seen the “how did he get her” phenomena first hand, right!? If you want to see it again, just head to your local mall and people watch. There you’ll see it, the guy with the black jeans and vans, hair messed up wearing a pac-man t-shirt texting on his iPhone talking about a movie he wants to see walking next to a gorgeous model looking girl wearing a jogging suit who’s just eating up every word he has to say. That there is what we call a “Geek-Lover” and is one of the benefits of being a Geek. How did he land her? Well more than likely one of his Geeky hobbies (music, art, movies, sports)put him in a place where he could talk to a woman of her caliber. And applying all you have read above just let his personality do the rest! In my opinion, Geeks are the “Renaissance Men” of our generation and what woman wouldn’t want that!? Now picture the Nerd you have in your head as you’ve been reading…would you or have you ever seen that walking next to that hot chick…? Didn’t think so…didn’t think so…

Geeks love Star Wars, Nerds love Star Trek! It’s true! ;) But, not for reasons that you are thinking! Geeks love star wars because of the dynamic character arc, the heroes journey, good vs. evil, samurai’s in space, John Williams! Nerds love Star Trek for its scientific accurateness…’nuff said! Now I know a lot of Geeks love Star Trek too, I’m partial to The Next Generation and the Classic 60’s show! But, I love it for the same reasons I said I love star Wars above. Nerds, need to have their mind challenged with facts and complexity or else they are just hearing “children’s fanciful bedtime stories.” In their minds, the things that happen in Star Trek are scientifically possible, so they can play along. They are just too smart for their own good, unable to enjoy superior story-telling and character dynamics for the inability to apply “suspension of disbelief”…J You know who and what I am talking about if ever you’ve thought to yourself or uttered the phrase, “Relax Nerd, It’s Just a movie!”

Geeks and Nerds, we get along for the most part. There is peace amongst us and that is great! The last thing I wanna start seeing is drive by protractor stabbings and Nerds going back to having their lunch money taken and atomic wedgies handed out on a daily! So, let’s just start callin’ a “Rose” a “Rose” and a “Daisy” a “Daisy.” Nerds, you know who you are and the same goes for you Geeks! Think about it, it makes sense…the movie was called “Revenge of the Nerds”, not “Battle of the Geeks” Cause you know most Geeks know some martial arts of some sort and there would have been a rumble if they tried any of that shit @ our house! We wouldn’t of been making pies and building robots, puttin’ on variety shows… So, look at yourself in the mirror…do you fit any of the characters in ‘Lambda, Lambda, Lambda’? If you do, congrats! You’re a NERD! If you know what I’m talkin’ about in the last paragraph and are having a chuckle, More Congrats! You’re probably a GEEK!

“Rock out with your Geek out!!!”

-Bishop